Isolation

My first meal in 4 days. It hit the spot — I desparately needed protein. Climbing down one flight of stairs caused me to breathe heavily and climbing slowly back up got my heart racing. My son prepared a plate of rice with chicken tenders and a soft-boiled egg. Mmm…was it good! Or was I just that hungry? The flavour that stood out was salty. The bacon bits in the rice added a nice texture, but no flavour.

This morning as I drove into the office to pick up my computer and books in order to work from home this week I stopped for take-out. Again to try to build up some strength. The orange juice was refreshing; it tasted…cold. The chicken patty was salty and the lettuce was crispy and juicy, yet it was all strangely tasteless. The Tiger Balm which I keep handy in my car door for those moments when I need to stay alert or clear my nostrils, although it cooled the skin below my nose, had no scent. Taking a deep breath through the inhaler was as frustrating as turning on a light switch during a power outage.

A week ago I picked up my mother to take her on a nice ride for tea with my son and other family members. We had a pleasant visit even though mom zoned out frequently and did not participate in much of the conversation. When I dropped her off at her care home she quickly fell into her chair and had a nap. She tested positive for Covid, as did I, last Thursday. After several days fighting high fevers and other symptoms, I am finally able to sit up for more than a few minutes at a time. This is not an illness I hope to encounter again in my life. Mom, thanks to her current state of dementia, doesn’t realize that she is sick. She sleeps an extra 4 hours every night, and won’t eat much at all, but can’t understand why she is stuck in her room.

On the drive this morning I noticed colours that stood out to me. They were ordinary colour, such as the changing of the seasons. Yellow leaves mixed in amongst the green. Bright sunflowers standing along white picket fences. Blue sky peaking through the clouds. These are all things that are visible every day yet today I noticed them. Isolation, even for a short time, changes our perspective.