Pussywillows…soft winds…

I’m reminded of the Gordon Lightfoot song, ”Pussywillows, Cat-tails, soft winds and roses”. Dad’s niche is a few feet away from this lovely planter. My son met me at the columbarium last week to see the new cover that was made for my father’s niche. When dad passed away there were so many unexpected decisions to make. Do we want to sprinkle the ashes or place them in a niche? Do we want a regular size square or larger rectangular niche? What about a box for the ashes? What do we want engraved?

My two siblings and I had many discussions by text, by phone and in person before any of the big decisions were made. I couldn’t imagine having to think this through on my own. What do people do when they are an only child?

I like to have plenty of time to make decisions, and normally I will discuss things with friends or family to get a more objective opinion. I don’t always follow their guidance when I have a choice, but it’s good to gather other ideas.

That day last week at the columbarium was a chance to stop the noise of life, and reminisce. I thought about dad’s involvement in that church and in the wider community. Looking around at the names of many of the other niches I could see that he was surrounded by good friends…people that I also had known. Over the years I played for many of their funerals and even some of their weddings. My son and I talked about dad’s love for roses and how fitting it was that the engraving includes roses laid on books.

It was important for some of the family that there be some sort of memorial where we could go and physically be nearer to dad. Of course, he is not there physically, but we now have a physical place where we can stop and sit and feel the soft wind, and remember.