I joke often that I still feel like I’m 18 years old. At 18 I was very shy, although learning to talk to people one-on-one in normal conversation. Yet, in front of the classroom (I was a substitute band teacher back in the days when all you needed was the skills and not the papers) I was fearless. The students, often around my age or only a year or two younger, listened and followed my direction. I loved that year of using my gifts to make a difference in the lives of the students.
At 18 I had not found a boyfriend and been only on a few very awful dates. But I was young and free. My parents moved away and left me to look after the house. Fortunately, it took a year to sell so I had the house to myself for that year! I could buy the groceries I wanted; I could make some basic decisions on my own — what to eat, when to eat, who to spend time with. It was a happy time for me.
Here is my letter to my 18 year old self:
Dear Sandra,
Enjoy every minute of the freedom that you have found at 18. Keep riding your bike early in the mornings to listen to the birds chirping. Go canoeing in the lake as often as want. Be brave and talk to people — they will like you even if you aren’t as pretty as the other girls. Stop at the viewpoints on the way to your piano lessons, to watch the creek and listen to the wind in the trees. These days won’t last forever.
When you are a bit older you will make decisions that affect you and your family in ways not imagined. Your desire to be free, and on your own will lead you to move to other side of the globe. Don’t be afraid of that. It’s who you are.
And when you are even older you will discover courage and bravery not imaginable until it is required. Don’t ever give up…you are strong, and you will survive even the toughest battles.
Reflections 